Transcribed by Savitri Devi Dasi
(Kadamba Kanana Swami, Serbian Summer Camp, 2009)
After I took sanyas some television crew came and they immediately put the microphone under my nose and said:
‘ Do you feel any different?
‘I said : ‘If you would ask that question to a man who has just got married, what would he say? He would say ‘yes, I feel different now, because I feel the weight of responsibility.’ ‘
I also felt the weight of responsibility then and there. I took that external commitment – Sanyassa – I walked around with this heavy vow, such a heavy vow- not to enjoy in this world – No sense gratification at all. Then I could see that I will never survive this unless I really fill it in with some genuine attraction to Krsna…
In this way, if we want to break our stagnated situation, then we must make a commitment that is greater then where we are now. It doesn’t have to be sannyassa, but any commitment in service to Krsna that will force us to also make a greater internal commitment.
But then again we will find a wall there also. Then we must make a fresh commitment, even greater. Again, that will force us to internally grow. It is in this way that we are increasing our surrender to Krsna – Not so much by mental or intellectual adjustment. We can’t do it. We are just not strong enough. But if we take commitment it will force us. When you take a responsibility then what are you going to do? The responsability will force us. So, when there is a stagnation, make more commitment in service to Krsna. That can be in different directions, it can be in sadhana, in practical service, in ashram,… It all depends on our individual situation.
Transcribed by Savitri Devi Dasi
(Kadamba Kanana Swami, Serbian Summer Camp, 2009)