(HH Kadamba Kanana Swami, 7th March 2012, New York) Lecture: Caitanya-caritāmṛta Part 3
There are many things in the Hare Krishna movement I have done that I would have never done! At one point they made me into a bookkeeper! I do not know if you can judge characters, but you have watched me here for a few days and I don’t look like your average bookkeeper! Generally people who are bookkeepers are steady, regulated and like things in order, and I think that you have already noticed that I’m a little wild!
So usually wild people do not make such bookkeepers, and I must admit that when I was doing the books in India, if it was one or ten rupees out, then I would put the one or ten rupees in from my own pocket, since I would rather do that then going through the whole calculation one more time! It balanced…. even if it’s ten rupees out – no problem, I’ll put them in, since I’m not going to find the missing rupees! But a real bookkeeper would say:
‘No…no it doesn’t balance. There is something wrong here. Now I have to do it again and find it.’
That I could never do… but I did it for Krishna, and yes within it I could also appreciate something, although I hate bookkeeping and I still do! It is about safeguarding Krishna’s property, and being very responsible about Krishna’s property, and that is something I gained by being a bookkeeper, whereas my conditioned mind goes like:
‘Oh my god. Imagine: Me a bookkeeper! That means that all my colourful side of my personality will have no more space…’
But then the other side begins to grow a personality who wants to actually develop a sense of responsibility for Krishna’s interest. In this way many aspects of a personality grow in this Krishna Consciousness!